They are just testing you!

Have you ever been a supply staff or new staff member during kindergarten indoor/outdoor transitions?

You know those times ... You don't know the students or your coworkers very well yet and then a young child chooses to ask YOU to help them zip up their coat, or put on their boots, or help with their mittens.

You smile warmly and say "Of course I can help. Thank you for asking." You quickly assess if they seem to need just a zipper 'plug in' or maybe a shoulder to lean on while they 'wiggle wiggle wiggle pop' their foot into a snug boot.

You stand up, look around to see where else you can help and then you hear it .. that angry, or resentful, or belittling, comment ... "You know, they know how to do it. They are just testing you." The implication is clear - they view the child as manipulative and they view you as a sucker.

The way I look at it is .. Yep, they may be 'testing me', but I don't believe they are trying to 'get the better' of me or 'trick' me .. or any of the other destructive and cynical ways to look at children.

Humans need to feel safe. Whether you are a kindergarten student who has been on this planet for less than 2,000 days or someone one who has travelled 100 times around the sun, I believe we all have an innate need to establish if our environment is safe.

So, when someone who has been on this earth for 1,400 days looks up at me to 'test' if the new person in the room is safe and caring - you better believe I will do everything in my power to pass that test to assure them their class environment is a place where they can be vulnerable, ask for help, and receive support and gentle guidance as they practice and develop their skills.

Thank you for reading this blog!

Please look forward to more tatamoc content.

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